Thantophobia

Gosh..! Seems ages passed and I was like…Looking for something which had some meaning or atleast resonated with what I feel…and today at this time … 10.38 pm on 23rd Jan 21, I saw … a word which had every emotion I go through. …Thantophobia.

Since my childhood I’ve always hidden my actual feelings just in case If they are known, my loved ones will be dead or leave me alone. Some incidents in my childhood and early teens, confirmed it. And today I still struggle with the same fear. I have a feeling that I am still being haunted by it. May be its true, the fear. Though I am trying to overcome it but Time pushes my efforts back everytime and confirms that my fears are true.

Night beauty regimen

Hi all, today I am writing something different from my regular writeups. Just because I felt I should share my regime with you all and may be I get someone’s regime in exchange which is more beneficial to me or adds something new to mine. So, just to learn something new I wrote this, hope you all like it.

Wash your face thoroughly or if tour skin is dry, you can use deep cleansing milk or for oily skin use astringent lotion after that apply night cream or your regular moisturizer before sleeping.

This will wake you up in the morning with soft skin and there will be no problem of dryness. Because as we know, the skin repairs itself in the night. So, the application of the night cream promotes the repairing system and rejuvenates the skin and makes it subtle and bouncy.

Whether you are worried about dark circles or not, apply Aloe Vera gel on the undereye area before sleeping. This, will give you relief from wrinkles around the eyes and the problem of dark circles will be solved. If you want, you can also use ghee or clarified butter.

The most important thing is not to keep your hair open at bedtime.

This makes them weak and it breaks easily as we twist and turn our head while sleeping. Always sleep by making a loose ponytail or a plait but no buns. Tight buns may again result in breaking of hair.  Also, massage with Aloe Vera gel on the scalp before going to sleep. This will give you relief from itching and dryness. Twice a week, give a hot oil massage to your hair and scalp in the night. It will relieve your stress and increase the blood circulation, a much needed therapy.This gives the hair a strong finish and strength. It also helps in their growth and your hair becomes long, dark, and thick.

If you have some patience and time in your hands, for a good night’s sleep you can try one more remedy…take half bucket of warm water, mix some Epsom salt or table salt, few drops of any essential oil and dip your feet in it for 10 to 15 minutes. But it will be more effective if you let your legs dip upto the knees, in warm water. This remedy even works as a relaxation therapy when you go for a tracking, long walks, or walking trails. It loses the tensed muscles and the pain and cramps do not occur.

These àre my sure shot tried methods. Hope you are benefited by these. Will share another regime in another post.

A love story that brought upheaval- Raskapur & Swai Maharaja Jagat Singh.

Pink city, the wold knows it better by this name instead of Jaipur or Jaypore. It is one of the largest cities of Rajasthan. Home to many forts and fortresses. The city has many stories to tell but the one I am going to share is of love, lust, conspiracies and loyalty, loyalty to kingdom and loyalty to love.

Keeping My point of view.

There are many versions making rounds and I will tell you all. But before that I want to put forward my point of view regarding such incidents in history. May be these points are still prevailing in society as political and influential tie-ups are in existence. And the point is that when a nuptial tie was made it was more for the financial and strategic benefits of the kingdom rather than the personal feelings. Thus occurred many unmatched marriages with many princesses and when the groom didn’t find the peace and love he looked for in his All wives he searched for it in the concubines and thus increasing the number of married and unmarried wives. And if by chance the king got the chance to marry his love, then also the strategic and financial pressure was there because of which he had to marry other processes also. This gave birth to polygamy and conspiracy. Many kingdoms have fallen down due to this reason alone.

Raskapur-Jaipur’s own Noor Jahan

Raskapur courtesy Adarsh Sharma Book Raskapur

Well, now I come back to the story I initially intended to tell. You can call it the story of Jaipur’s own Noor Jahan. She was born of a court dancer, whose father side was doubtful. She was beautiful, fair and talented girl, thus named Raskapur or Ras Kapoor. Kapoor (camphor) is here a symbol of fragrance in the form of talks of her beauty and talent making rounds in the city.

There used to be different departments in the then kingdom of Jaipur, each related to respected chore of the erstwhile estate. Among these was the ‘guni-khana'(department for skills, arts and talents) where she learned dancing under Paro begum.

She performed in many programs and danced her way to the Royal Court. Where she came in the eyes of the king, Sawai Maharaja Jagat Singh, who fell for her and thus began their doomed love story. She even called as Anarkali of Jaipur.

The king was already married to 21 queens and had 24 concubines but he gave his heart to only one, Raskapur. Who remained with him till his last breath.

They say, you can kill a person but you cannot kill the love one feels for someone, same was the story.

Titles to Raskapur

After she first entered court as a dancer, she was bestowed with two titles out of which of utmost importance was ‘Paswan‘ which meant ‘Close to‘ , in other words she was not the queen but close to the king and exercised same power over the king as the married queens. In some cases the power if ‘ Paswan‘ overpowered the queen’s authority. Same happened here to. Maharaja Jagat Singh found his soul mate in her and on his birthay he gave away his half kingdom, pothikhana(administration department) and one more important department to her. This gave her the right to sit in the court right beside the king on throne. She started to govern and make decisions regarding feudals, and their kingdoms. Maharaja even took her to the public gatherings on festivals along with him, on the elephant.

Maharaja Sawai Kagan Singh

He had given up the social rules and regulations and didn’t feel awkward in showing off his relation with a concubine. He made a separate palace, ‘Ras Vilas Palace’ for her near ‘Chandra Mahal‘, the abode of Royal family. It is said that she had some differences with one of the queen’s and was asked to leave the palace and thus she came to live in her own palace.

Krishna Kumari

Princess of Mewar whose death is a mystery, KRISHNA KUMARI

Between all this, The then Maharana of Mewar sent the proposal of his daughter Krishna Kumari to Maharaja Swai Jagat Singh, to which he didn’t agree but it is said that, it was Raskapur who talked him to say yes to the alliance, sighting the strategic importance of the marriage alliance.

But actually, the facts are, the Mewar princess was first engaged to Marwar Maharaja and this sudden change in equation upset him. He stopped the Procession on the way to Jaipur, in his kingdom. Feeling insulted by this, Jagat Singh prepared his army and attacked on Marwar. The Pindar chief, Amir Khan of Jhotwara took the golden opportunity to attack Jaipur. This turn table situation made him come back to Jaipur.

Different views on the end of the story

It is said that when Jagat Singh came back, the courtiers, Feudals and queens( who already were jealous of Raskapur) conspired against Raskapur and got her sentenced to prison. And from here the various views of the painful ending of a lovestory, which bloomed against all odds and under the shadows of swords and conspiracy came to an end.

One view says, that when the Maharaja was busy fighting Pindaris, his ministers and queens got her killed, in the Nahargarh fort, where she was kept prisioner. She was thrown out of the window of the room and as the fort is built on the oldest mountain range, Aravali, she fell down to her death and when the king came to know of her demise he was so heart broken that within a year he died.

NaharGarh Fort
Window from where Raskapoor is said to be thrown.

The other lore goes something like this, when the king was fighting, he got injured and later died. His last rites were being performed at the Royal funeral grounds, Gaitore. Raskapoor on hearing this, disguised herself as someone else and crossed the fort gates and reached the funeral ground and on watching the pyre on which Jagat Singh’s body was burning, she took a leap and jumped into it and burned alive with her love of life.

GAITORE
GAITORE

The third opinion is, when the Maharaja returned from war, the whole court, Feudals and the queens convinced him to sentence her to lifetime imprisonment on the self created proofs and stories of her mistrust, disloyalty and conspiracy to kill the Maharaja. Both were eagerly waiting to get the chance to meet. Meanwhile, the British made an ally with Jagat Singh, which gave small time relief to him from the neighbouring kingdoms but it was short lived as the conspirators were active knowing Maharaja’s inclination towards Raskapur. They killed him and when this news reached Raskapur she tried her best to get out of the Nahargarh fort and was able to convince one of the Feudal king, who was responsible olfor her upkeep in the prison. Then on his guarantee she was allowed to leave the prision on a promise that she will come back. But as soon as she reached the funeral grounds, she was taken back by the sight of her love burning on the pyre. The next moment, taking everyone by surprise, she jumped in the fire. The bodies burnt away leaving behind the hatred and politics, to be together in the eternal journey.

End

Thus this was the end of Jagat Singh’s short reign from 1803 to 1818 and he died young at the age of 32. He is known as the notorious king of Jaipur. It is said that Nahargarh fort is haunted by her ghost. And some say its haunted bit by couple of other ghosts. But that is another story.

Will come back with a short account of Jaipur and Jodhpur clash story because of Krishna Kumari. Ofcourse I have my point there also about woman converted to commodity. But as I said that’s another story. If you all like this one, I will come up with next one.

Update: Nahargarh is now a state run hotel.

Gaitore is a famous tourist spot now.

My experience

I lay eyes wide open. I could see the fan moving, I could see the night light hanging. The tube light was on, as ever and I could see all the details of the room we are sleeping in since last month. But the thing is I could not shout, I could not move. I felt that I was rising above, nearing the ceiling of the room but then I tried to adjust my vision and found that I was down on my  bed and not above. I tried to shout so that someone (in my mind I wished my hubby) could come to help but the no one came. I tried to see if I was really awake and not dreaming. So I felt for my daughter’s hand which she placed around my neck, while sleeping it was there,   I couldn’t turn my neck around but my eyes  could move so I looked at my son who was sleeping sideways facing the cupboards. Then I could see my own hands crossed at wrists and placed over my forehead.

Again I concentrated on the fan and the night light it was all normal. I was awake. I looked around the room for conforming that I was not sleeping because just before that two times I had the same experience repeated but that was in my dream as there was darkness in the room and the only light coming was from the street light, through partly uncovered window. So, this time I was sure that I was wise awake. I wriggled my toes to break the spell and cew moments later I was ok. I turned sideways, towards my kids and felt that my daughter’s hand was now really tightening round my neck but I did not bother to remove it. I looked once at my sleeping son and closed my eyes just then my mobile rang and my husband who came late from a party, asked me to unlock the main door so he could come in.

I was feeling a bit clumsy, my head dizzy yet went downstairs, unlocked the door came back and slept.This was the least fearing episode of sleep paralysis in my life

Short story completed.

I can’t believe that I completed 4, 872 words in 10 days. With full day work of a house maker and a family of 8 members. Attending to their needs now and then, dealing with the trying in-laws.

Above all the trying conditions of COVID -19 taking toll on me and peace of my mind. But still I managed to complete one short story. A murder mystery. Its about a daughter in law and mother in law. Where daughter in law warns her mother in law to stop her affair with the math teacher of her daughter. On the day of her first wedding anniversary she is found dead.

From here the quest of her mysterious death starts. Everyone is under suspicion. The math teacher and Mother in law are prime suspects. Her husband, his business partner, a long lost childhood friend who was business rival, were also suspected. Each of them had a motive to kill her but its a challenge to find out who did it and how? In the end the case has to be closed as suicide.

Hope to complete another short story soon. Outlined it already now have to start working upon it. This is about a young girl interviewing a killer as her own assassin. The girl is depressed about loosing a friend who died saving her, from a car accident. Feeling her pain for a person who actually never was, one of the best assassin falls for her. And offers to kill her in a bid to save her from doing something stupid. This has to be developed a little more.

I am trying to accomplish a collection of short stories which I can publish. Hope I am able to do it with all your best wishes and support.

Introducing little womders – 3

In the series, this is the third installment and it’s done by my 8 year old daughter. She is improving on her skill as I have noticed. But want all your support to encourage her.

Someday I will share her writings, too. She writes stories good for her age. But she needs support, encouragement and guidance from experienced people like you. Hope to hear from you.

Tips and Exercises : for improving Writing

3 years journey in this blogosphere and writing journey since I remember. And after taking it seriously, I have learnt many things about writing.

When I started this blog, I was naive. Still I am not expert and I believe there is no end to the journey of learning and improving, in any field leave apart the wiring. This journey is ever evolving. There is no end to learn something new every time.

In this journey of mine about writing and learning the tricks of trade, I have come across many books, blogs, magazines and what not which have helped me to improve my writing and emerged as a better writer. I now, know the difference between the hobbyist I was and a serious writer I am. 

I want to share the sort of tips and the exercises which have helped me to improve on myself as a writer. Hopefully, you all will like these, too.

Tips are like bonus points to me. I keep looking and for. A single one can make a huge permanent impact. So here I share my ever growing TIPS treasure.

# Ask More Questions.

The more questions we ask, the more likely we are to find out something extra ordinary. Questioning is something very interesting part of finding the facts or gathering the knowledge. The more we ask about are subject the more interesting and vivid answers we find. These answers lead to more questions and the cycle goes on. The deeper we research the more material we collect and this forms a never-ending source of inspiration.

# Take Small Steps.

Only think about the present, this paragraph, this page, this chapter. If you think about the novel as a whole, it will break you down and you will abandon the whole idea of writing easily.

# Imagine Your Reader.

As you start writing our novel post or article or an essay, you should try to imagine your ideal reader. What age are they, what gender, intellectual or someone who is not so highly educated. keeping this in mind you should write according to their taste and understanding.

# Be Willing TO Write Badly.

As a writer it’s your first duty to write. Write without being judgmental and straight from heart. Rather than focusing on tenses, focus on clean, crisp sentence.  Write from your heart, write for yourself when you are writing. Leave the editing part till you have put down everything on the paper. It’s better to have something to make corrections to rather than to stare at a blank page.

# Be A Ruthless Editor.

If something seems chunky to you, the writer – then it probably is. Always prune the sentence. Edit Mercilessly. Don’t fall in the trap of lovely words. They have to go. Be simple, be clear and don’t go for the decorative words. 

# Grab Time.

Don’t wait for finding time but utilize whatever, whenever  and where ever you get time.

# Keep Emotions In Place.

# Respect Words.

Word choices should be conscious. Being lazy makes our writing a failure. Respect words and maintain a curiosity about their shades of meaning.

# Be A Reader, First.

Always remember, to write with the perspective of the reader. See what is interesting, to you as a reader and not as a writer.

Tips From Julia Cameron

  • Be brave. Morning pages make you brave.
  • If you spend three pages cleaning away the rubble of your life, your novel writing will come more easily. You might be writing morning pages because you are clearing out the negativity in your life – bold and can write more freely on your project.
  • What would you love to write? It’s about getting down. It’s like taking dictation. It’s like listening to what’s want to be written and writing that.
  • Abandon the rules. Write from the heart.

Tips From Self – Publishing School.

  • While writing a book ask a few questions to yourself.
  • would you pick it up.
  • Write as often as you can.
  • Learn the craft of storytelling.
  • Focus on new ways to phrase common visuals.
  • Practice writing in your hand.
  • Use strong language.
  • Just write to write. Believe it or not, this frees up a lot of mental space and allows you to write without thinking much, which often helps you to write better.

Writing exercises are very good for many reasons, for instance to put the tips in use and get the creative juices get flowing. Here I will share what writing exercises I have collected and follow.

  • Just write.
  • Writing prompts.
  • Choose a place you know well to write about. In a few words describe the place. Write a poem in any form that describes this place in detail.
  • Ask a question of ` What if? ‘
  • Pick a color of your choice and write 25 sentences starting with it.
  • Free write. It doesn’t require you to write in a linear, logical pattern. Pick a new question, a new thought a new problem and just keep writing. The habit of free writing could transform your life.
  • Describe your love interest’s eyes without using color. you can replace eyes with hair, lips, choice of clothes etc.
  • Describe Same character twice – once to fall in love with and second time, to be repulsed by them.
  • Edit someone else’ post. A person whom you don’t know, choose their post as it will be easier to focus on the editing process. While reading someone else’ post you can be a bit more critical, which trains your eyes to find the same mistakes in yours while you are proofreading.
  • Re-writing with a gap between the draft and editing of being at least two days. The gap gives my mind to absorb upon it and work in unconscious which gives better and improved results the next time.
  • I practice creating headlines or topics without using phone or laptop for help. It’s kind of brain storming on the Topics.
  • Use picture prompts.
  • Character and scene development.
  • I search for interesting news articles and then do research again, then develop them in my style.
  • Pick my favorite book and pick a random page then take a line from that page which is of the same number as of that page and with it, write – some times its the beginning or the ending.
  • Morning Writing
    • Fiction, poem, article, travel tips etc.
      • Write part of a book.
      • Blog
      • Video Script

Passion

Hi one and all. As few days back I started a new post where I shared with you all that I will be introducing budding artists, here I mean art in its extended form.

Now, continuing that series, I present you one more little artist but this time he is a lover of caricature art form. He is none other than my 11 year old son. I am posting here one of his drawing and hope you all will encourage him as well.