I am sorry for being so irregular. Actually, this past month was very confusing and lost. Turmoil is the word that describes best my mental condition from last couple of months. I start something and eventhough I put my best of interest in it, I can not continue.
I just keep it aside and sit lost and exhausted. Month of January, I assigned to reading and in 2 weeks were ok. I complete 3 1/2 books but after that the concentration started wandering. I am able to complete hardly 2 books in past months.
Whenever, I sit down to write there is something which I cannot describe and it doesn’t let me continue more than one day at maximum. I am bit tensed.
So, I have decided to take a leave of my present surrounding and go to my brother’s place for 2 months and leave all my tensions and worries here. May be it will give me some time to write and read.
Hope, it goes well.
Negative vibes travel faster than any other mood vibes. And they tend to linger on longer too.
If in a house hold of 6 members where you have your in laws living with you, the chance of negative vibes are more. If your oldies are orthodox and conservative like mine and on top of it they have bossy nature. So, when they get to face an opposition or something goes against their thinking then, you are surely in for a blast.
This blast may happen specifically between the two oldies because they finally have no one else to fight with as no one listens to them. You can sense the tension even from 10 feet distance or as in my case, we stay on the upper story of the duplex apartment and they stay on the lower one. When I put my fist step on the stairs, I can feel the gloom of hitting me hard. And I get to know that something has happened downstairs between the two. Their negative vibes loom for days and sometimes it grabs me. The side effects are visible in my hubby also in the form of sad or irritated mood. I get depressive feeling due to this and once I am hit by those monstrous feelings, its very hard to get rid of them easily. Thought I try to keep my cool but it literally takes a lot to stay positive. Sometimes the poor children have to face burnt of it all. I fear my poor sun, who is a pre-teen suffers a lot because of my oldies` negative and narrow mindedness. Poor child has so much of frustration for many issues. I try my best to balance and tell him to practice meditation and learn to practice patience. He is sometimes not able to control his anger. I am worried about him.
Sometimes the negative vibes take a toll on our relation too…days pass with the communication stranded. May be there are situations with you also when you too don
t want to talk with any one. May be you feel that if you talk your barrier on anger may give away or you might want to tell straight forward to them about their immature behavior. I don't know how many of you relate or agree with my point; but one thing is for sure, that negativity invites sadness which invites doom. May be its bit exaggerated but its true.
Though I suffer the heartache of being at the receiving end I try to come out of it as soon as I can.