Some times it felt that he understands what I go through, he feels sorry for what he did to me. But now my all misunderstandings are cleared.
Whatever I use tontell him, he only heard it but never understood, not a single word of it. My all tears were in vain. Now I am again standing on the point from where I started my journey few years back…all alone and lonely. No one to support, not a single soul to console me.
Suddenly everything has lost its meaning and every moment has become empty. New emptyness, meaninglessness, painful feelings have entered my soul, afresh.
I am like on staring into the blank with a confused look in eyes and on face, still not getting why am here and above all why in the first place did I entered this relation, jsut to face this situation? No, I mean sometimes I find myself wondering is this my ppave, 7s this my home, or am I at someone’s place and using their rights as my own. Have I made a mistake and taken someome else’s place, so the condition? Whatever it is, I dont feel it right. I am desprate to just leave everything and go hiding in some unknown place.
Just done with my quota of pain. I cannot bear anymore. I am totally broken, just one more blow, a single one even a slightest blow and I am gone. Gone for good and ever. So fragile I have become.
Hope there is something which holds me up tightly for few more days, just in case someday everything might turn into right direction. Or may be I become more tough to resist the blows.
If nothing comes in my support, I wish, wellwishes of people who feel deep and understand the pain, are with me. Thanks all of you for lending an ear, understanding and extanding support. My hearty wishes and prayers reach out to you all.