Returning Pain.

Sometimes the pain is there. It should not be but it comes smiling and registers it’s presence. Every time I fight with it I think I have conquered it and made myself immune to it, now onwards I won’t be hurting. But every time it returns with deeper reach within and I first react like a bucket of cold water has been poured over me. Afresh from every experience I just loose myself a bit every time. May be there will be a day when I would disappear. I heartily wish for that day’s early arrival. It’s too difficult to live without your true self. Nothing’s worst then knowing that you are not actually who you are behaving like. Sometimes I feel no I wish he should realise this pain in me of me being alienated from myself. But for him it’s for good that I have changed. But still I hope for him to realise at least once, I know it won’t make me, me, but at least it would allow to face the situation with little ease knowing that there is a heart who understands my problem.

2 thoughts on “Returning Pain.

  1. This heart understands – the one we love can help to heal and share the pain, and she doesn’t realize for me, I feel she’s running away from this. But the pain is needed too and not to fight it but wrap it in love (love i can support her with but she doesn’t realize), and to make room for her goddess self. What you speak of is the most beautiful gift, to become a powerful conduit for love and a mission to heal this world when she’s ready.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Check out Celia Hales blog if you haven’t(mentions books ACOL and ACOM). Also recommend, a tool of healing and transformation. It should be dipped into once or twice a day in order to be useful. As your healing is not only about reading books and gaining more information, it’s about letting go, releasing the minds control. And this is a very different process to gaining information ABOUT the process. This journey is experiential.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s